I was lying on my Shakti mat the other night when my daughter came into my room wanting to talk. She was upset because she’d been feeling jealous of one of her friends. So, we sat together and talked about it for a while. We spoke about how caring about someone means wanting good things for them too — that jealousy doesn’t have to mean resentment or wanting to take something away from another person.

After the conversation, I kept thinking about jealousy. Because we tend to treat jealousy as something shameful. Something to hide, suppress, or pretend we don’t feel.

But what if jealousy isn’t always a bad thing?

What if, sometimes, it’s simply information? A signal pointing us toward something we might want for ourselves. What if instead of burying it, we became curious about it?

They ran a marathon. Signal: Maybe I’ve been wanting to challenge myself physically too.

They went on an amazing holiday. Signal: Maybe I need to prioritise adventure, rest, or saving toward something meaningful to me.

They got a new job they love. Signal: Maybe I’ve outgrown where I am and it’s time to start working toward something different.

Because perhaps jealousy isn’t always about competition. Sometimes it’s simply awareness. A quiet recognition of something we long for, admire, or hope for ourselves. And maybe when we stop treating jealousy as something ugly, we can start using it more honestly — not to pull other people backwards, but to help propel ourselves forwards.

Perhaps we don’t need to feel ashamed of the feeling.

Perhaps we just need to listen to what it might be trying to tell us.